After I finished the last sentence in the previous paragraph, I went to put out the laundry to dry, took a seep of water from the refrigerator, had a piece of chocolate and took a toilet break before finally sitting down once again to write; I lacked the self-discipline to focus and concentrate on the writing.

Just with most things in life, often time we lack the self-discipline to see us through what we are hoping to do or achieve. One area where self-discipline is clearly important is in losing weight.

Some people are constantly looking for quick fix to their weight problem; they will jump at anything that gives them guaranteed weight lost in the shortest time. They may lose weight fast, but they will find the result short term especially if they do not change the way they live and the food they eat.

To me, I strongly believe that the best way of losing weight naturally is through changing our living habits and what we eat. Doing that will not only ensure keeping the ideal weight permanently (through continuous self-discipline), but will also give us the many health benefits that come with living right and eating right.

A friend’s colleague shared his experience going through the journey from 115 Kilograms to 56 Kilograms in around one year. Not only does he look fresher and younger, he has also inspired his wife and friends to follow in his lifestyle.

His journey of losing weight started from a trip with his daughter to the doctor for her check up. He playfully weighed himself on the weighing machine while his daughter was having the check up. The doctor saw his weight and made a remark, “If you maintain that balloon weight, you cannot see your grandchildren.”

That made him decide, “Enough is enough!” Not only that, he felt tired easily and his excessive weight made him feel like a walking balloon. In that moment of awakening, he made decisions to change his lifestyle and eating habits. To him, this is the one proven way to lose the excessive weight. “Seeing my kiddos help me stay disciplined.” He said.

How did he do it? He first calculated his Body Mass Index (BMI) and set the goal he wanted to achieve. Then he cut down on the amount of food intake as well as changing what he was eating (no junk food, no refined-Carbohydrate, less or no fried food). Eventually he becomes a Pescetarian. The second part is doing lots of Cardio-exercises from badminton to running to squash and just nature trekking sometimes. The trick is to do these Cardio-exercises regularly. He did it thrice a week.

In his own words, “There is only one way: in two parts to lose weight; eat right and exercise. And this is a lifelong thing.”

Another thing which probably contributed to his success in losing the excess weight were the moral supports from family, friends and colleagues. However, without him first deciding to lose the excess weight and then keeping it going through self-discipline, he would not have done it!

Announcing the Rebuild Haiti Better World Book Drive! Better World Book is running a nation-wide book drive to raise funds for education in Haiti and they need your help to support a long-term effort to rebuild Haiti’s education system. By sending books, you can help fund their Haiti non-profit literacy partner, Plan USA. So dust off those great books you’re never going to read again, and do some good with them…

Ways You Can Help:

1. Send Books. Books can be sent to:

Better World Books
Attn: Help Haiti
55740 Currant Rd.
Mishawaka, IN 46545

Please send only books in good condition. Note: Book donations are not tax deductible.

2. Run a campus book drive for Haiti - click here to sign-up.

3. Make a cash donation to one of our partners:

Restore Education: Donate cash now to Plan USA
Rebuild Libraries: http://www.ala.org/haiti

How it works:

1. You send books to Better World Books at the address above.

2. The books donated will be sold on their global network of marketplaces including BetterWorldBooks.com.

3. 50% of the net sales are donated to Plan USA, earmarked for the Haiti education rebuilding effort.

About Plan USA:

Plan USA is Better World Book new non-profit literacy partner. Funds raised through the Rebuild Haiti Better World Book Drive will be applied exclusively to education in Haiti.

Plan USA has been working in Haiti since 1973. They were recently selected by the Haitian government to implement the country’s education restoration effort alongside the Ministry of Education, UN agencies, local and international NGO partners.

Better World has made an initial donation of $10,000 to the Plan USA effort to rebuild Haiti. You can learn more about Plan USA at: http://www.planusa.org/

The questions are, “Was person A seeking solutions from person B for her problems at work? Or person A simply needed a listening ear?” There are no straightforward answers for this.

This is one common mistake in relationship which I tend to make very often previously. Usually when someone told me his/her problem, I just assumed that I was supposed to fix it. You can guess the frustration when the person said, “I didn’t ask for your opinion or advice.” In my mind I was wondering, “Why are you telling me about your problem in the first place when you don’t need my opinion or advice?” I didn’t understand that the person just needed someone to talk to and at time to sympathize with his/her situation.

I have come to realise that we are not expected to fix problems always from books and seminars which I attended. From then onwards, I tried to be a mind-reader; trying my best to grasp what the other person needed. Sometimes I was right, sometimes I was wrong. Wouldn’t it be much easier if the person just tell us what he/she wants?

In the book ‘Finding the Words: Candid Conversations with Loved Ones,’ the author Susan P. Halpern cited a story:

Lester felt inadequate, he realized, when Judy aired her personal concerns. He did not know what to do or say. His impulse was to think up a solution right away. All Judy wanted from Lester was that he listen when she talked about herself. He did not need to fix anything.

… Only by telling our partner what we want can the need be met. Judy realised that she only wanted to be listened to. That was it. She wanted to hear herself talk through her issues, maybe get a little sympathy, and she would be fine.

When Lester came up with his great ideas, Judy felt he was saying she was dumb for not thinking of them herself. She felt belittled and dependent. He was the only one who could fix things, she felt.

When she told him that she just needed time to talk and a friendly ear, she felt better and she went on to handle her problems in her own way. Judy had to tell Lester that she just wanted him to listen, and he learned to do just that.

In communication, we not only need to listen attentively, patiently and openly but we also need to convey our thought and need accordingly. Trying to read mind or assuming the need of another is a mistake that cause tension and conflict between a couple, family members and friends. We need to clearly communicate to each other what we want.

Most adults on the other hand have the ability, through learned experience, to differentiate people who are genuinely sincere and good from those who are not. This is one of the reasons, and a valid one, why parents find it necessary to protect baby from people who are not genuinely sincere and good.

In the process of growing up, the child will see, hear and pick up hatred we show to others along the way. We too had unconsciously learnt to hate from our parents and people around us; not that they wanted to teach us to hate on purpose, but through their words and actions, we imitated them until at such time that their words and actions become part of ours too. We eventually ‘pass’ these words and actions to our children. This is a vicious cycle that will stop only by consciously teaching our children to love people from the heart.

However, in order for us to be fitting to teach our children to love, we must first learn to love like them. Did I just contradicted myself? It makes sense actually. We need to first learn to love people indiscriminately and with an open heart from them. Then we lead by example to love people indiscriminately and with an open heart. A challenging thing to do but so is anything worth fighting for.

Through conscious teaching of ourselves and our young ones to love, I believe that one day most, if not all, of us will be loving people.