Archives for Moving on category
Posted on Mar 09, 2013 under Attitude, Be the Change, Challenges in Life, Choices in Life, Dealing with Adversity, Empowering Ourselves, Inspiring, Lesson in Life, Letting go, Moving on, Reflection, seeing things from a different perspective |
A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”
It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don’t carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down!
It couldn’t be more simply and vividly put across than the short passage above. One of my junior college teachers once said to us during a lesson that 70% of our worries will never come true. Don’t ask me, I have the slightly idea where she got the 70% from. She was my Physics teacher and yet she taught me a lesson in life which I will never forget.
Isn’t it true enough? Most of our worries are a waste of time and they didn’t come true most of the time. Worries can be useful especially those which we can do something about them. Instead of wasting time worrying, we might as well make change if it is within our abilities. If there is nothing we can do about them, we might as well accept them and do our best to make good use of them.
As for stresses, what have always been said is that a little stress is actually good and it gives us motivation to take action and move forward. Yet a lot of stresses, if not handle properly, do have their detrimental effects on our lives. This short passage is a wonderful illustration which I would make use of to remind myself about not holding on to stresses for too long; the glass of water will just get heavier and heavier.
Are you currently holding on to your glass or even glasses of water?
Photo Credit: Yogesh Mhatre
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Posted on Apr 25, 2012 under Attitude, Be the change that you want to see, Blaming others for the mistakes, Focus on doing good things, Forgiveness, Gratitude, Happiness, Inspiration, Kindness, Life, Living, Love, Loving Kindness, Moments, Moving on, Reflection, Responsibility, Sharing, Simple life, Taking responsibility, Tips for a Better Life |
Inspired by a reading yesterday, I would like to share these ways to simplifying your life.
1. Focus on doing good things and all else will follow. This morning I read a comment someone made that being a good person is the world’s toughest task. Indeed, it could very well be the greatest challenge – especially when we put the focus on being a good person. Abraham Lincoln said it best when he said, “When I do good I feel good, when I do bad I feel bad.” Let us focus on doing good things and being a good person comes naturally in the process. It couldn’t have been more simpler than that. To do a rain check on ourselves, we can use the Integrity test: What we do when no one is watching us should be the same as when we know that someone is watching us. And follow our heart, not our ‘desire’, as it will always have the right answer for us.
2. Change should and must come from us – FIRST. I am a strong believer of Mahatma Gandhi‘s philosophy, “Be the change that you want to see in the world.” Instead of trying to change people, we lead and inspire the change.
3. Spend time with positive, loving and happy people. We know that positiveness and happiness are highly contagious, and yet we are allowing ourselves to be ‘beaten’ continuously by negative people around us. Have a clear picture of the kind of person we want to be and associate ourselves with like-minded people who are supportive and are willing to help us to become the person we aspire to be. It is easy to let go of negative people who are not closely related to us. How about those closely related to us? I’m not telling you to cut the tie completely; let them know that you will keep the lifeline always open for them and yet understand clearly that you can lead the horse to the river, you can’t make it drink. Understand also that they may not be ready now and there will be a time when they are ready; be there for them when they are.
4. Start loving people, including ourselves, and let go of any hatred we may hold of others. As Buddha said (I changed a little in this context), “Holding on to hatred is like grasping hot coals with the intent of throwing them at someone else, we are the one who will get burned.” Harness the power of forgiveness and free ourselves. As Louise Hay said, “I forgive everyone in my life, and release them with love. They are free and I am free.” Forgiveness free the people we hate and most importantly – free us.
5. Live in the present. Learn the lessons from the past and leave the past where it should stay. Start living in the moments. The things we are doing today will create the tomorrow we dream and putting our attention to the current moments can make a huge difference in simplifying our lives. Take care of today and tomorrow will turn out to be what we want it to be.
6. Start to take up responsibility. Putting the blame on others accomplishes nothing and complicates things. Be the master of our fates and the captain of our souls. Choose to be in control of ourselves, then to let go of that control to someone else.
7. Put useful information in our minds and mind our own businesses. The mind is the garden of our well-beings. Would we dump rubbish into our gardens? Yet, we are putting useless information into our mind. Online social medias like Facebook, Twitter etc are splendid way to keep in touch, yet many spend hours everyday minding the businesses of their friends in these social medias. We should be the one making use of these social medias and not the other way round.
8. Take a step backward in making decisions. Moving backward could be the best way to forge ahead sometimes. Think things through before making decisions especially when we know our emotions are kicking in. The best decisions are usually made with a clear mind.
And as Confucius said it best, “Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” A simple life is a life without rules, just a set of guiding values. So forget about what you have just read here and start living.
Photo by marcos_bh
Posted on Mar 16, 2011 under Attitude, Children, Compassion, Dealing with Adversity, Donation, Giving, Japan Earthquake and Tsunami, Kindness, Life, Love, Loving Kindness, Loving Thoughts, Moving on, Reflection, Saving Lives, Social Message, Social Responsibility, Unconditional Love |
Mt. Fuji by James Farmer
Pardon me that this post came much later; it was easy to be caught up in the news, watching what was happening in Japan and finding out if friends and their families were safe after the quake. Fortunately, I was able to contact my friends and unfortunately, I couldn’t say the same for others who are still doing their best to contact their friends and families. My heart goes out to all of you.
As I reflected in the quietness of my room, many images flashed through my minds; images of babies, smiling children, elderlies and faces … faces whom I do not know and yet they seem to be just like the faces of my friends.
It dawned upon me that these images of babies, they could have been the images of our babies. These images of smiling children could have been my smiling niece and nephews, giggling as they tried to climb up to the lap of their uncle. These images of elderlies could have been our grandparents and parents. Last but not least, these images of familiar faces could have been our best friends, friends and working associates. It could simply be the images of people whom we hold dearly and closely in our heart … it could be images of you and I.
In that moment of quiet reflection, I realised there is no Singaporean, American, British, Indian, Chinese or Japanese etc; there is only human being of one united race on Planet Earth.
Symphony of Love is making a special request from you to continue to send prayer and positive wishes of Loving Kindness and compassionate to our friends in Japan and for those of you who are able to help out financially, below are some ways:
1. Singaporeans may make a cash, cheque or SMS donation to the Singapore Red Cross for victims of this disaster.
For walk-in donations, the Singapore Red Cross is open from 9.30am to 9pm from Mondays to Fridays, and from 9.30am to 6pm on Saturdays, Sundays and public holidays.
For cheque donations, cheques should be made payable to the “Singapore Red Cross Society”.
Donors may also donate via their mobile phones to 75772. For every SMS, S$50 will be donated to the “Japan Disaster” fund.
2. For American, you can make direct donation to American Red Cross.
Resources related to the crisis in Japan and ways to help, from Google.
Let us continue to send positive wishes of Loving Kindness and Compassion to our Japanese friends. As the saying goes, “Strangers are friends we have yet to meet.“
Posted on Dec 09, 2010 under Attitude, Be the Change, Choices in Life, Dealing with Adversity, Information, Inspiration, Life, Moving on, Perseverance, Reflection |
Do you resist changes in life? Honestly, I do resist changes in life sometimes. Most people or at least a lot of people resist changes too. Changes come especially challenging when things are getting very comfortable. Just imagine a rainy morning and you are all warm and cozy in your bed but you have to get up and get ready for work. Do you give yourself another 5 minutes in your bed and then take another 5 until you know you will run late if you continue to snuggle in bed. I know I would sometimes.
And yet, it is exciting to get out of bed. I would love a cup of hot chocolate to start the rainy day, watching the raindrops falling from the sky, the ripples they create when they fall into a pool of water, the sound of the raindrops beating against the window and last but not least, the freshness and sweetness in the air.
For me, it has been the most exciting 4 months and with a lot of changes. What I observed or experienced was a challenge would follow every change. At first the challenge would appear insurmountable and that is because we do not have the capability yet to overcome it. Or rather, what I will say is, “We thought we do not have the capability to overcome it.” However, the truth of the matter is, “We will not be given a challenge too big for us!” This is what I believe and this is what I use to remind myself constantly.
Just as we might continue to focus on the challenge and some will view it as problem; we must remind ourselves to focus on finding the solution. We may not have direct control to the challenge, but we always have the Power to choose what we want to focus on. Use that Power which is given to you and which cost you nothing. Because frankly speaking, if we do not use that Power given to us, someone else would be using the Power given to him/her to choose for us. Just as the quotation from the movie The Astronaut Farmer, “You better know what you want to do before somebody know it for you.” So we better start using that Power given to us before somebody use his/hers on us.
And finally after we overcome the challenge, we grow. With every challenge, there is a great potential for us to grow and to become a better person. Not only that, we are automatically ready for bigger changes and challenges in life. This simple reason of growth makes change ever exciting for me!
What we really must do is Embracing Changes and Challenges and this journey call life will surely be an exciting and memorable one!
What does changes and challenges mean to you?
Photo by k_vohsen
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