When I first came across this quotation by mary anne radmacher, I could really relate it to the story of Anne in the recent Bersih 2.0 (9 July 2011) in Malaysia. whom in the words of Charlotte Hew “… her spirit, passion and dedication put mine to shame.” I believe the picture alone speaks volume and there isn’t much else I could say to eloquently describe the courageous act of Anne. No matter how much the Malaysia’s authority had denied, on National TV, the firing of tear gas at the protesters and into the Tung Shin hospital, the truth will always prevail! 709 was a day where we saw Malaysians all over the world united as in a single voice to call for electoral reforms.

Below was the story of Anne as told by Charlotte, posted with permission from her; pardon me that I took this long to put this up. As much as Symphony of Love is a site focus on love, peace and inspiration, injustice must be brought into the light and shown to the world.

Anne, from setapak, took a bus ride down to KL, ALONE, in support of the rally. she was stopped 4 times, being asked her IC, and questioned by the police on why she’s wearing yellow. “why can’t I wear yellow?” was her reply.

she didn’t know what time the rally was scheduled to start, she didn’t know where, she has no one with her; all she knew was to get down to KL, and stand for what she believes in.

the first thing she asked when she sat on our table, “what are you guys doing here?”

Anne teaches English in government schools for about 35 years (if i remember correctly). but her passion is really singing and dancing; and what she values most in her life now is freedom.

Anne has rallied in bersih 2007. she was disappointed as to why no one else was wearing yellow that day. we said chill lah.. that’s cuz if we do, we’d be stopped by the cops even before we get the chance to enter KL. “it’s so sad.. it’s so sad that the police are treating our rakyats like these.”

“When you come to rallies, there’s a spirit of unity… something i cannot describe… when everyone is united for a cause. you don’t even get this sort of unity in church.”

She left me with a question that still resides in my heart. now may i impose on you to think about it. “Why do we have to feel so scared (and threatened) in our own home land.. and by own countrymen?”

After I finished the last sentence in the previous paragraph, I went to put out the laundry to dry, took a seep of water from the refrigerator, had a piece of chocolate and took a toilet break before finally sitting down once again to write; I lacked the self-discipline to focus and concentrate on the writing.

Just with most things in life, often time we lack the self-discipline to see us through what we are hoping to do or achieve. One area where self-discipline is clearly important is in losing weight.

Some people are constantly looking for quick fix to their weight problem; they will jump at anything that gives them guaranteed weight lost in the shortest time. They may lose weight fast, but they will find the result short term especially if they do not change the way they live and the food they eat.

To me, I strongly believe that the best way of losing weight naturally is through changing our living habits and what we eat. Doing that will not only ensure keeping the ideal weight permanently (through continuous self-discipline), but will also give us the many health benefits that come with living right and eating right.

A friend’s colleague shared his experience going through the journey from 115 Kilograms to 56 Kilograms in around one year. Not only does he look fresher and younger, he has also inspired his wife and friends to follow in his lifestyle.

His journey of losing weight started from a trip with his daughter to the doctor for her check up. He playfully weighed himself on the weighing machine while his daughter was having the check up. The doctor saw his weight and made a remark, “If you maintain that balloon weight, you cannot see your grandchildren.”

That made him decide, “Enough is enough!” Not only that, he felt tired easily and his excessive weight made him feel like a walking balloon. In that moment of awakening, he made decisions to change his lifestyle and eating habits. To him, this is the one proven way to lose the excessive weight. “Seeing my kiddos help me stay disciplined.” He said.

How did he do it? He first calculated his Body Mass Index (BMI) and set the goal he wanted to achieve. Then he cut down on the amount of food intake as well as changing what he was eating (no junk food, no refined-Carbohydrate, less or no fried food). Eventually he becomes a Pescetarian. The second part is doing lots of Cardio-exercises from badminton to running to squash and just nature trekking sometimes. The trick is to do these Cardio-exercises regularly. He did it thrice a week.

In his own words, “There is only one way: in two parts to lose weight; eat right and exercise. And this is a lifelong thing.”

Another thing which probably contributed to his success in losing the excess weight were the moral supports from family, friends and colleagues. However, without him first deciding to lose the excess weight and then keeping it going through self-discipline, he would not have done it!

The reality in life is the prince and the princess do argue like any couple but they also get on very well and know it would be silly to fall out over silly things. Their priority for marriage is the same – making it works.

Amy Bloom said, “Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together…” Like dancing, we need to understand that our partners are individuals with point of views which may differ from ours; a dance step or movement which feels good to us may not feel good to them. Many time we could be affecting our partners without realising it ourselves. Then we started blaming each other for making the “wrong” movements. We need to communicate clearly to each other to make the ‘dancing’ relationship in marriage works.

And marriage is definitely not the ‘end’ of a relationship. It is a lifelong commitment in the other person and the start of a lifelong courtship. There should always be new excitements; plan for little surprises which you know will bring smiles to your partner. Find time to appreciate each other’s presence and to spend time with each other, even when you have children. Continue to go out on dinner or movie dates. No, not with the children, but just the two of you. Find a babysitter or nanny if you have to. Just go on dates as a couple.

And like what Benjamin Franklin said, “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.” We have to understand that no one is perfect in this world and we must learn to see the perfection in the imperfection of our partners.

Last but not least, I believe that we should also encourage each other to grow individually and to learn new things in life. I have always believe that even when a couple is married, the husband and wife should continue to have their own circle of friends who they can hang out with from time to time. Each should take time to take care of children and things at home and encourage his/her partner to go out with friends and to pick up new things. I believe by doing this, it will encourage personal growth. As in the poem ‘Marriage‘ by Kahlil Gibran, a united soul in two bodies.

The first thing that comes to my mind when I’m writing about my personal experience is Love. It’s such a mushy idea and yet so strong that it can conquer all differences and the vast distance separating two persons deeply devoted to each other. But sometimes, Love just ain’t enough. You can either see it as ‘There isn’t enough LOVE to see you through it all‘ or ‘Love is not enough to pull the two of you closer and part the seas separating you.’

LDR lives on thanks to modern technology. Yes, Internet helps more than the telephone. In this age, we are glad there are Skype, MSN messenger and every single chat function on Facebook, Gmail and Yahoo. We, the survivors of LDR, are grateful for the existence of Internet!

LDR basically works like any other relationship. You chat with each other over the silliest and mushiest things, you go on dates (when you see each other) or on virtual dates and you send each other kisses (minus the physical contact). For anyone who thinks that physical intimacy is vital in a relationship then he will not even try a LDR. Because sooner or later, he will cheat on her (physically or mentally).

I guess the best part of LDR is you will get lots of breathing space. You are free to do whatever you want as long as you keep your virtual dates in mind. You won’t have the problem of a sticky girlfriend or boyfriend. I guess it’s a great way for both parties to grow and mature enough to handle such a relationship.

At the end of it all, LDR is really painful. Communication is key. Yes, we all know that but you need to communicate on the right issues. Are you ready to commit to that someone? LDR means one or the other has to compromise, that is, he or she has to move from his or her current location in order for it to work ultimately. This is easier said than done since most of the time, family and/or work can play an important role. Well, all I can say is, every single person is different, every LDR is different. Love can conquer everything but do you let it?

*Special Thanks to Sher from Ur Resident Chef for this guest post. Sher is a very long time friend and from whom I learned a great deal about dreams, love, commitment and passion.

Photo from barunpatro

Thank you also to PinkLady from Of Living and Loving… and Coping for passing me the Humane Award. It is truly my honor.