Just about a week ago, I was discussing with my co-workers turned friends that I just realised – again – that as much as we want to reach out and help everyone, we simply could not reach out and help all. Most people would have the idea that I am talking about people who are not willing to be helped. I agree to a certain extent. However, over here, I am referring to someone who we wanted to reach out and to help and we just do not have the expertise or ability yet.
How did I come to realise it? It was all a magical journey if we would so much as to listen to our inner voice and the Universe.
Just a few weeks ago I was in contact with a potential new student to coach. During the evaluation session with the boy and his parent, I realised the boy may be dyslexic; I came to the conclusion from what the parent described to me and from my personal observation. Although I am not an expert in dyslexia, I was able to read about it from books and from people’s personal dyslexic experience before. Besides that, I had a chance to discuss about it with a parent who has two dyslexic children. And because of her own children, she has started a freelance service to help other dyslexic children.
The challenge was how to put forward what I observed and my thoughts to the parent; especially when not all parents will accept that their children are different. Thus I began cautiously by explaining my observation of their boy and giving them the examples of famous people (Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Leonardo da Vinci, Whoopi Goldberg, Tommy Hilfiger, John Lennon, Richard Branson, Agatha Christie just to name a few) who are dyslexic.
I also stressed that dyslexia has nothing to do intelligent; it is just a form of learning disability and if we are able to find the key to open up the learning in each of the child, he/she will have great potential. Apparently, they have come across that and they just thought their boy is a little slow in his learning. I wanted to link them up to the parent who are doing freelance service to help other dyslexic children but they weren’t receptive about it.
In the end I took up the challenge to give it a go. My co-worker and I went through one session with the boy and came out totally clueless what we could do to help; it was simply not within our ability and expertise. True to my personal observation, he is a very smart boy. Besides that, he can be very focus. I felt that it would not be right for us to coach him; what he really needs is someone with the expertise to find the right key to help him to learn.
My sincere apology to the parent who was willing to give us a shot. Fortunately, they were very understanding.
Through that one incident, it just dawned upon me that as much as we want to reach out to everyone and to help everyone, there will be time when we have to admit that we do not have the ability yet. However, as Helen Keller said, “… because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.” We must continue to do what we can to reach out to people who we have the ability to help. With that say, there will also be time when we have to take up new challenge to stretch our abilities.
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Photo by khattaway
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The fact that you even tried to help, is awesome. And like you said, you can’t always help everyone. It was just a situation/area that fell outside of your expertise.
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“dyslexia has nothing to do intellect” – As someone who battled dyslexia – I could NOT agree with you more.
@ Meleah, thank you. I just thought I could help … but you are right, sometimes some situation/area just falls outside our expertise.
Yes, this is so true!
So often we are willing to help so many more people than perhaps we are able to help. Sometimes, as I have come to realize myself, we simply may not be the best help for them, sometimes people need to hear our message but perhaps said in a different way, from a different source. There are so many things to consider when helping others.
But yes indeed, you did a great thing by being open and willing to help, this goes such a far way and the beautiful words from Helen are a great addition to this message.
@ Evita, I couldn’t have said it better than you; sometimes people need to hear our message but perhaps said in a different way, from a different source. This is what I observed with our students here; they tend to tell us more than they are telling their parents.
Spreading ourselves too thin is not what God asks us. He gives us certain abilities to help and reach out for someone—-only what we can do for them.
Hi, SOL, it’s been a while since I was last here.
I love that you cared enough to give it a try with this little boy. It shows your beautiful, sympathetic heart.
Sometimes, we try to help but we’re not the best kind of help for that person. It takes a level of maturity to keep extending that help, though. I think that what happens to others is that they don’t know the power they have to be helpful, so they don’t even try at all. It’s those people (and so many of them), that I think are always worth reaching out to in order to empower and inspire them to share their capabilities to help others.
@ Bing, indeed, spreading ourselves too thin may not be advisable at all. However, we do need to stretch ourselves constantly to grow.
@ Belinda, it has really been a long time. Good to see you back here. Indeed, it takes a level of maturity to keep extending that help. It would certainly be good if we could inspire other who don’t even give it a shot, to start reaching out to others. Thank you for your words of wisdom.
Hey, this reminds me of the blogging world too — spreading ourselves too thin sometimes. So many blogs, never enough time. Yet, we reach out when we can, and with those we do continue, in friendship and goodwill.
xo
@ Jannie, you couldn’t be more right.