What does a renown house like the Fallingwater has anything to do with the meaning of life? To you and I, the connection may not be so direct. However, to Frank Lloyd Wright, could the meaning of his life be, ‘to create masterpieces like the Fallingwater.’ Or did he give his life meaning by creating masterpieces like the Fallingwater?

In Viktor E. Frankl‘s book, ‘Man’s Search For Meaning,’ he said that a lot of people are going through life asking, ‘what is the meaning of life,’ when they should be giving their lives meaning by what they are doing everyday. Previously I was also constantly asking myself what is the meaning of life and it was like a dog chasing its own tail; I was going round and round in circle.

Then what I read in Viktor’s book made sense to me. When one is searching for the meaning of life, one is not in control of whatever life throws at one. However, when one gives his/her life meaning, one is in control of whatever he/she does. Then what meaning should one gives to his/her life?

In Bill Strickland‘s book, ‘Make the Impossible Possible,’ he mentioned, “… a good life isn’t something you wait for, or chase after, or try to possess; it’s something you must create, moment by moment, on the foundation of your dreams.” What Bill said resonates with what Viktor had mentioned in his book isn’t it?

The connecting dots are then in the dreams that each individual holds. In so speaking, there is a need to know what are one’s dreams. Failing to know one’s dreams in life will make it impossible to live a fulfilled and happy life. Then how does one know his/her dreams? The question is, ‘what are we passionate about in life?’ Found out what we are passionate about and then build our dreams based on our passion.

Now, “What is the meaning are you giving to life?”

It has been more than two months into the new year. Have you already made your new year resolutions and following them faithfully? I believe many would have resolved to be a better person this year or to have a better health. Or do you resolve to improve your relationships with loved ones and people around you? Or could it be to be more successful and wealthy this year? More spiritual and to help more people this year? Or could it be what I want to share with you in the following?

I remember reading a quotation in one of the blogs, while dropping entrecards at the start of the new year, that goes something like this, “new year is a time for us to redeem ourselves; to set things right and to right any wrongdoings and to relive our lives.”

Did you put up a quotation like this in your blog at the start of the new year? If you did, I would love to give you the credit by linking back to your blog. Do let me know in the comment.

The quotation got me in deep reflection. I thought initially that new year is indeed a good time when we can start everything on a fresh note. Then again, it is only true to certain extent. Is new year the only time when we should collectively reflect upon our lives in the past year? 365 days is a long stretch of period; do you still remember exactly what you had done last year at this time?

The thing is why do we have to wait for another 365 days to pass before we start reflecting on our lives again. Who says that resolution can only be made yearly and before the start or at the start of a new year?

I am grateful for the fact that I am still alive and writing this at this very moment. I am grateful to be still breathing in the air that you are breathing. I have learnt that if I wanted to do any good, I have to be alive in the first place. What? You knew that simple truth a long time ago? Alright, I admit I am slow in some areas; better late than never.

I have reminded myself almost every night to be grateful that I am still alive. What is the meaning of being alive? To me, everyday I get to wake up in the morning, I’m bless with a gift – the unique gift of life. This gift of life continues to allow me to make a difference in the lives of others and to correct whatever wrongs done in yesterday. The unlimited potential of doing good.

Quoting a paragraph from the book, ‘Make The Impossible Possible,’ by Bill Strickland, “Sometimes, the hardest thing about living an exceptional life is realizing what it means, in simplest and most essential terms, to be alive. Just waking up to the fact that you are alive – that each day and each moment you’re on the planet gives you once-in-a-lifetime chance to build the future you dream of …”

If I can make life easier for at least one person a day, that will be 365 people a year and around 13,000 people in my lifetime; assuming the average lifespan of a man is 70 years old. Not very impressive but not bad also. Of course, these numbers can be reduced drastically if someone up there decides that my time is up today. One must really make full use of his or her time given and live it to the fullest!

As I took in another breath, I am filled with gratitude. Time is bad now especially with the financial crisis happening everywhere and it may have taken its toiled on you, but to be alive, you are open to greater possibilities and potentials. It will get better! Quoting something John Gokongwei, Jr. said, “The important thing to know is that life will always deal us a few bad cards. But we have to play those cards the best we can. And we can play to win!”

Last but not least, I would like to wish everyone a Happy Valentine’s Day. Yes, it is that time of the year again where lovers will re-pledge their loves for their loved ones. Take this day to renew your vow towards your loved one but always remind yourself that everyday is a Valentine’s Day.

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Thank you iWalk from iWalk, U2? for giving me the passionate blogger award and to Michele from Digital Artisan for giving me the Lemonade Award.

I would also like to take this opportunity to thank Aldon from Orient Lodge for informing me of the Trojan alert coming from my website a few days ago and for helping me to test it after I cleared the site of the alert. Thank you for taking the time to do that. And I hope that none of you were affected by it yesterday. My sincere apology for any inconvenience caused to all of you.

They were having a farewell party at the pub and everyone was drinking and catching up for the last time before going their separate way. It had gone to a point whereby some were getting emotional and were weeping. In that moment, someone said, “Don’t cry – everyone will be friends forever.” Yes. That is true to certain extent and only for a few. I particularly agree with the author’s point of view that ‘keeping in touch with someone you can’t see and hear takes energy and imagination that few have.‘ If you and the person you are keeping in touch with believe in this. There will be a good chance to be friends forever. Otherwise, one will find it challenging even to find time to send an email. Friends forever – it is possible when both sides make time and effort plus a right portion of expectation. In fact, what is being said here can be applied to most relationships. In order to make a relationship work, it takes a good amount of communication but you will need to find time and to put in the effort to communicate in the first place.

Well, the key thing in the article that caught my attention was not how to be friends forever but rather in a statement that Janice wrote ‘You can’t take today with you.‘ What immediately came across my mind when I was reading it is that the statement makes a lot of positive sense. It reminds me of a quotation by Helen Keller.

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens: but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”

How often have you come across someone who told you that he/she had just broken up? Most initial response will be, “You will find someone new.” And isn’t that true for most people … eventually? The ones that never found someone new, most probably they never allowed themselves to start looking again after they went through unhappy relationships.

The underlying issue is that some people tend to hold on to the broken relationships longer than they should have. A question which I read in some books with a little modification, “If you knew that you would win the game by doing your best, how would you play the game?” For sure you would have played it confidently and have given it your best shot. The same rule can be applied here, “If you knew that you would meet someone new eventually, would you leave the closed door as soon as it closed and start to look for another open door.

For one who believes that thing always happened for a reason, he/she will not have any challenges of moving on. You may ask me, “For what reason it happened?” What I can say is that we may not always see the reason immediately when it happened but when we do, it will be like “Ahem, so that’s why!” And sometimes we may not even realise the reason.

Naturally, life won’t be the same when we let go of what is already gone. However, I could not have put it more aptly than Janice that, ‘different doesn’t have to mean worse.’ It is not a guarantee always that different will be good when you chose to let go. But it is a sure guarantee that life ‘stop’ when you continue to hold on to what is already gone. Like the farmer ploughing in the field, there is never a guarantee of a good harvest. The farmer knew that he/she has to continue to plough if he/she wants a harvest and like the law of seed, the more he/she plough, the chances of a good harvest increase. It is when the ploughing gets the tougher, it means that the harvest is nearer. Just like the say, “when the night is the darkest, it means that soon the day will break.”

We can’t take today with us … so we have to continue to move forward with the faith that tomorrow will be better and a lot of times, it really depends on ourselves to make tomorrow better. I wish goodness in everyday of your life and that you will have the courage to move forward fearlessly.

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There is a general saying that says, “Everything happened for a reason.” Do you believe or rather do you agree with that saying? Just as a coin has two sides, some of you will agree with that and others will not. There is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ in whether you choose to believe in it or not. I believe that ‘Everything happened for a reason.‘ Sometimes we can see the reason immediately after it happened. At times, the reason will only be seen much later and when you see the reason, it’ll be like those moments of ‘aha!’ That was why it happened.

For people who believe in a Greater Being above, they will say that they are being put through tests to prepare them for greater things ahead. For me, I see it as opportunities for growth; chances for me to surpass myself to become a better person so that I can be of better service to others around me. My aim is not to ask you to search for the reasons for everything that happened but rather to believe that you too are given unique opportunities to grow.

In so speaking, that will lead to the following statement, “Is there meaning to suffering too?” If we applied the above saying, then suffering happened for a reason too and suffering too provides opportunities for one to grow. In the book Man’s Search For Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl under ‘The Meaning of Suffering’ in page 112, he said, “We must never forget that we may also find meaning in life even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed. For what then matters is to bear witness to the uniquely human potential at its best, which is to transform a personal tragedy into a triumph, to turn one’s predicament into a human achievement. When we are no longer able to change a situation – just think of an incurable disease such as inoperable cancer – we are challenged to change ourselves.”

He went on to cite an example of one of his cases:

Once, an elderly general practitioner consulted me because of his severe depression. He could not overcome the loss of his wife who had died two years before and whom he had loved above all else. Now, how could I help? What should I tell him? Well, I refrained from telling him anything but instead confronted him with the question, “What would have happened, Doctor, if you had died first, and your wife would have had to survive you?” “Oh,” he said, “for her this would have been terrible; how she would have suffered!” Whereupon I replied, “You see. Doctor, such suffering has been spared her, and it was you who have spared her this suffering – to be sure, at the price that now you have to survive and mourn her.” … In some way, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of sacrifice.”

On a seperate account he shared:

“…when a rabbi from Eastern Europe turned to me and told me his story. He had lost his wife and their six children in the concentration camp of Auschwitz where they were gassed, and now it turned out that his second wife was sterile … the rabbi evaluated his plight as an orthodox Jew in terms of despair that there was no son of his own who would ever say Kaddish (a prayer for death) for him after his death.

I made a last attempt to help him by inquiring whether he did not hope to see his children again in Heaven. However, my question was followed by an outburst of tears, and now the true reason for his despair came to the fore: he explained that his children, since they died as innocent martyrs, were thus found worthy of the highest place in Heaven, but as for himself he could not expect, as an old sinful man, to be assigned the same place. I did not give up but retorted, “Is it not conceivable, Rabbi, that precisely this was the meaning of your surviving your children: that you may be purified through these years of suffering, so that finally you, too, though not innocent like your children, may become worthy of joining them in Heaven?”

Although this is Viktor E. Frankl’s ways or methods in helping his patients find meanings in what they are going through, I do see the underlying opportunities for his patients to grow through their incidences. One does not always have to search for the reasons or meanings for what happened, but to always believe that ‘Everything happened for a reason‘ and always attached with an unique opportunity to grow.

What do you think? Do you believe that ‘Everything happened for a reason’ too? Or do you have your own way to put it? Do feel free to share it with us in the comment.