1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip.But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks,love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have sillyness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

And yet, it is exciting to get out of bed. I would love a cup of hot chocolate to start the rainy day, watching the raindrops falling from the sky, the ripples they create when they fall into a pool of water, the sound of the raindrops beating against the window and last but not least, the freshness and sweetness in the air.

For me, it has been the most exciting 4 months and with a lot of changes. What I observed or experienced was a challenge would follow every change. At first the challenge would appear insurmountable and that is because we do not have the capability yet to overcome it. Or rather, what I will say is, “We thought we do not have the capability to overcome it.” However, the truth of the matter is, “We will not be given a challenge too big for us!” This is what I believe and this is what I use to remind myself constantly.

Just as we might continue to focus on the challenge and some will view it as problem; we must remind ourselves to focus on finding the solution. We may not have direct control to the challenge, but we always have the Power to choose what we want to focus on. Use that Power which is given to you and which cost you nothing. Because frankly speaking, if we do not use that Power given to us, someone else would be using the Power given to him/her to choose for us. Just as the quotation from the movie The Astronaut Farmer, “You better know what you want to do before somebody know it for you.” So we better start using that Power given to us before somebody use his/hers on us.

And finally after we overcome the challenge, we grow. With every challenge, there is a great potential for us to grow and to become a better person. Not only that, we are automatically ready for bigger changes and challenges in life. This simple reason of growth makes change ever exciting for me!

What we really must do is Embracing Changes and Challenges and this journey call life will surely be an exciting and memorable one!

I believe that most of us have read the words below in one way or another; either you have read it through an email from your friends or you may have read from somewhere else. However, how many of us have actually stopped, really thought and taken a moment to reflect on what were shared in these words. These words were attributed to Erma Bombeck who achieved great popularity for her newspaper column that described suburban home life humorously from the mid-1960s until the late 1990s. Bombeck also published 15 books, most of which became best-sellers.

Lets take a moment to imagine our life is already at its end but we are given another chance to have our life to live over again starting today. How would we live it differently?

If I had my Life to Live Over by Erma Bombeck

If I had my life to live over, I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television – and more while watching life.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.”

There would have been more “I love you’s”.. More “I’m sorrys” …

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute… look at it and really see it … live it…and never give it back.