I certainly agree with her that entering a relationship requires a leap of faith. And of course, we do not plunge blindly into a relationship. Not plunging blindly, that leads us to the question, “How do we know we have found the right person?” I believe this is one question which many people asked.

I did bungee jump a few years back. Some of my friends said I must be crazy to try it. Maybe I was crazy back then; but I knew it is one of the things which I want to try once in my life. I digressed. Taking bungee jump too requires a leap of faith. However, I did not take the plunge blindly.

From Wikipedia, “Despite the inherent danger of jumping from a great height, several million successful jumps have taken place since 1980. This is attributable to bungee operators rigorously conforming to standards and guidelines governing jumps, such as double checking calculations and fittings for every jump.” I knew that nothing would go wrong; I had faith in the people handling my jump. Some would be worried if their heart can take it. Frankly, that was the last question on my mind, because my natural intuition told me somehow that I could take it. Everything is history now.

While bungee jumping is not for everyone, entering into a relationship can be for everyone – as long as one do not give up on loving. However, like bungee jumping, entering into a relationship requires us to take that leap of faith in another person. Often people would ask, “how do we know we have found the right one?” The answer is, “We wouldn’t know for sure.”

There is no way I can tell you how you would know if you have found the right one. Since we wouldn’t know for sure, we have to take chances to get to know the other person better. While we are ‘exploring,’ we must be on the look out for signs and tune in to our intuition. The signs and our intuition are there to help us to determine if the person is the right one.

Much as we must have faith in our intuition, trusting our intuition may not provide the 100% guarantee that we have found the right one also. Our intuition can help us but it can work against us also. At time, what starts nicely can still end up horribly. The challenge with bad relationship is learning to let go.

When we see the goodness from a relationship but not ignoring the warnings from signs and our intuition, we will be able to take the leap of faith and take the plunge with confidence.

The first thing that comes to my mind when I’m writing about my personal experience is Love. It’s such a mushy idea and yet so strong that it can conquer all differences and the vast distance separating two persons deeply devoted to each other. But sometimes, Love just ain’t enough. You can either see it as ‘There isn’t enough LOVE to see you through it all‘ or ‘Love is not enough to pull the two of you closer and part the seas separating you.’

LDR lives on thanks to modern technology. Yes, Internet helps more than the telephone. In this age, we are glad there are Skype, MSN messenger and every single chat function on Facebook, Gmail and Yahoo. We, the survivors of LDR, are grateful for the existence of Internet!

LDR basically works like any other relationship. You chat with each other over the silliest and mushiest things, you go on dates (when you see each other) or on virtual dates and you send each other kisses (minus the physical contact). For anyone who thinks that physical intimacy is vital in a relationship then he will not even try a LDR. Because sooner or later, he will cheat on her (physically or mentally).

I guess the best part of LDR is you will get lots of breathing space. You are free to do whatever you want as long as you keep your virtual dates in mind. You won’t have the problem of a sticky girlfriend or boyfriend. I guess it’s a great way for both parties to grow and mature enough to handle such a relationship.

At the end of it all, LDR is really painful. Communication is key. Yes, we all know that but you need to communicate on the right issues. Are you ready to commit to that someone? LDR means one or the other has to compromise, that is, he or she has to move from his or her current location in order for it to work ultimately. This is easier said than done since most of the time, family and/or work can play an important role. Well, all I can say is, every single person is different, every LDR is different. Love can conquer everything but do you let it?

*Special Thanks to Sher from Ur Resident Chef for this guest post. Sher is a very long time friend and from whom I learned a great deal about dreams, love, commitment and passion.

Photo from barunpatro

Thank you also to PinkLady from Of Living and Loving… and Coping for passing me the Humane Award. It is truly my honor.

No big deal you may say. That was not what caught my attention anyway. What really grabbed my attention was the following passage:

The day before Thanksgiving in 2005, Kathy Sartore, married to photographer Joel Sartore, learned she had breast cancer. “Cancer is a thief. It steals time,” Joel says. “But cancer can also be a blessing, an amazing experience that forces us to set things right. My work had made me a stranger to my three kids. With Kathy sick, I knew it was time to stay put for a while.”

Kathy Sartore has beaten cancer and Joel is given a second chance to treasure his wife and kids. Life may not always be that generous and merciful; not everyone will get this kind of second chance. Some people did not even get the chance to bid farewell to their loved ones. A few years back, a friend shared with me an incident of his friend who regretted for not being able to rush back in time to see his father for the last time.

A quotation by David Grayson which I have always shared, “Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.“ We certainly do not have the power to turn back time, to change history and to undo any regrets. However, we certainly have the power to create new history now and to leave no room for regrets.

Are there someone whom you care about and have not kept in touch with for a long time?

Joel Sartore said, “Kathy’s cancer made me realize how little time any of us really has.” Very true isn’t it? Quoting something from ‘The Last Lecture‘ by Randy Pausch, “Time is all you have. And you may find one day that you have less than you think.” We are always thinking that there is always time to let our loved ones know how much we love them, but the truth is, we will never know if there is a tomorrow.

Sharing with you a beautiful poem composed by Norma Marek in 1989, in memory of a lost child. Norma Marek lost her battle with cancer on 17th July 2004. I first came across this poem at: Mature Not Senile.

“Don’t be angry with children, you’ve come along the same way. Don’t laugh at old people; you’d go to the same way.” – Japanese proverb shared by Nyanko from Rain Cats And Dogs.

A tribute to all mothers and fathers in the world. The write up below was translated by me directly from a Chinese poster I saw, pinned up, on one of the doors at my sister’s house. A gentle reminder that we were once ‘old’ when we were young. Does this make sense to you?

A Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers in the world! Thank you all for the unconditional love and sacrifices you have all made for us!

When I am Old

When I am old and not my original self,
Please be understanding and be patient with me.

When I spill the soup on my own clothes,
And forget how to tie my shoelaces,
Please think about how I had taught you, step by step, to tie your shoelaces.

When you are tired of the words, which I am repeating,
Please listen patiently and don’t interrupt me.
When you were young, I had to repeat the same story again and again until you fell asleep.

When I need you to shower me,
Please don’t blame me.
Do you remember how I had to coax you to take your shower?

When I am helpless with new technology and things,
Please don’t make fun of me.
Think about how I patiently answered every ‘Why’ you had.

When both my legs are too tired to walk,
Please stretch out your strong hand to support me.
Just as I stretched out my hand to you, when you were learning to walk.

When the topic of our conversation slip my mind,
Please give me a little time to recall.
Actually, whatever the topic of our conversation is of no importance.
I will be contented, as long as you are listening to me by my side.

When my time has come, please don’t be sad.
Understand me, support me,
Just as how I treated you, when you were starting to learn about living.