A few days back when I was compiling some informations on Rabindranath Tagore, I came upon one very inspiring quotation by him. It goes, “I have become my own version of an optimist. If I can’t make it through one door, I’ll go through another door – or I’ll make a door. Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.”

What is installed for you in another door? That, I have no answer for you. With another door, there are always uncertainties and new challenges associating with it. No one can even give you the guarantee that things will be better and no one can tell you that things will be worse either. You may have to go through more than one door. However, like standing in wet cement, if we stand long enough in it, we will get stuck in it.

Like Helen Keller’s quotation, “… often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” Are we missing the opened doors too?

Just as the day will eventually break the darkness of the night, another door will eventually bring us new lease of life. Let us have the faith as what Rabindranath Tagore said, “Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.”

I was reading Beyond Basketball: Coach K’s Keywords for Success on adversity, which Mike Krzyzewski mentioned that, “what separates good teams and individuals from great ones is the manner in which they handle adversity.”

I could not have agree more with that. Adversity provides an unique opportunity for one to grow, to discover about oneself and to breakthrough personal limits. In his book, Beyond Basketball, he mentioned that, “whenever I face adversity, I look at the problem and then beyond the problem. I look for the positive impact it will have on me, my team, or my family.”

I would never have understood that, not until two years ago when I was in Philippines and going through it myself.

I had stayed in the Philippines for almost one and a half year in 2003 – 2005 in Makati and in Davao City. I stayed in Davao City for about 8 months and I loved the city. I would say it has the best of both world. Being a city, it has many amenities and facilities that come with a city but at the same time, you will get to enjoy peaceful moment at night like in the countryside. Basically it is also a safe place to live in; I remember I was walking alone in the street 2, 3 a.m. in the morning and I did not feel threatened in anyway.

And what about this city that taught me to handle adversity? There was once I had to make a trip to a college which is about an hour or two away by taxi. I was pretty excited to be given an opportunity to present to a group of students. Throughout the journey to the college, I was going through the presentation in my mind and at the same time enjoying the scenic view on the way to the college.

When I reached the college, the students were already in the lecture hall waiting for me to start my presentation. Without any further delay, I set up my projector and the laptop. Within minutes, I was good to go. There was only one challenge; the laptop refused to power up or rather the hard disk had crashed. Basically, the laptop had chosen the ‘most appropriate time’ to break down and had it not broken down, I would not have had the opportunity to grow.

My presentation slide was in the laptop and even if I had a soft copy of the presentation slide, there were no other computers or laptops which I could use. And so I stood there for a moment facing the group of about 20-30 students and their eyes were all looking at me and waiting for me to start. What could I do? I had no choice, or rather I was already given a choice; the show must go on.

I saw a white board just besides me, I asked for a few white board markers and so the show began. At first I was worried as I did not know how I should do the presentation or what I should say; I had never done the same presentations on white board before. But within five minutes into the presentation, I found that everything started flowing naturally to my mind. In fact it was much better if I could say; the session was more interactive and engaging.

Since I didn’t need to follow the presentation slide, I allowed more questions from the student. Do you think the students enjoyed the session? I certainly believe they did.

What occurred that day was not only a learning experience for the students, but also a good learning experience for me. I remember a quotation that states, “Remember that challenges are not there to stop you. The challenges are there to help you grow.” Similarly, adversity provides us with opportunities not only to grow but also to breakthrough the limits that we set for ourselves. Adversity challenges us to change our own beliefs from ‘I don’t think it can be done,’ to ‘it can.’

Right now you could be going through adversities in your life especially with the bad economy. But remember adversity are there for a reason, to challenge you to challenge yourself.

This year, on my birthday, I received a special gift from a friend. My friend and his girlfriend gave me ‘The Last Lecture‘ by Randy Pausch (Oct. 23, 1960 – July 25, 2008) with Jeffrey Zaslow. Randy Pausch was a Computer Science Professor at Carnegie Mellon. Some of you may have read the book already. It was first the lecture before the book. ‘The Last Lecture’ is a series of talks by Professors who were asked to imagine their demise and to give talks on what matters most to them.

However, for Professor Randy Pausch, he didn’t need to imagine it as his last since he was diagnosed with terminal cancer and had only a few months left to live. His lecture was not about dying, but that of “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.” Through his moving presentation, Professor Pausch talked about his lessons learned and gave advice to students on how to achieve their own career and personal goals.

One of the points that sunk deep into me, like words set in stone, was the point he made about brick wall. If you watched ‘The Last Lecture’ video, which I have embedded here, he probably mentioned the brick wall about a dozen times. As he said, “Brick walls are there for a reason…” How true isn’t it?

Throughout our lives, we will have many brick walls. Some of which are invisible to the eyes like the emotional brick walls which we might build to protect ourselves and at the same times preventing others from reaching out to us. Such brick walls are the hardest to break through as it depends a lot on ourselves to break through them. And even before we can break through them, we have to be self-aware of these brick walls that we have built up around ourselves.

The other brick walls are often made of flesh; by our loved ones, our friends and people around us. It can be a challenge to break through these walls too especially when we knew that our loved ones and friends are concerned about us. However, being concerned about us doesn’t mean that they will always know what may be best for us. In this case, we not only have to break through the physical brick wall but also the emotional portion that comes with it.

However, as what Professor Randy Pausch said, “Brick walls are there for a reason…” They are there to test how much we wanted what we want. In his own words, “… The brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.”

Are you facing any brick wall in your life now? Do remember that the brick wall is there for a reason.

And ‘No,’ this post has nothing to do with the song ‘Don’t Look Back‘ by Boston.

This is a poem shared by a subscriber of Symphony of Love. This poem reminds me of a previous post I wrote on ‘We Can’t Take Today with Us.’ There is a similar message in this poem for us to look ahead and to move on with life.

There are numerous challenges in life and with these challenges, we often have to make difficult decisions. A lot of people dislike making decisions, especially because of the element of uncertainties. On top of that, making decisions usually require us to move out of our comfort zones; which many are resistant to change. However, when we do make decisions, let us embrace the changes and move forward courageously. The dawn is breaking …

Don’t Look Back

As you travel through life, there are always those times
When decisions just have to be made;
When the choices are hard and solutions seem scarce,
And the rain seems to soak your parade.

There are some situations where all you can do
Is to simply let go and move on,
Gather courage together and choose a direction
That carries you toward a new dawn.

So pack up your troubles and take a step forward-
The process of change can be tough,
But think about all the excitement ahead,
If you can be stalwart enough.

There could be adventures you never imagined
Just waiting around the next bend -
And wishes and dreams just about to come true
In ways you can’t yet comprehend.

Perhaps you’ll find friendships that spring from new interests
As you challenge your status quo,
And you learn there are so many options in life
And so many ways you can grow.

Perhaps you’ll go places you never expected
And see things you’ve never seen -
Or travel to fabulous far-away worlds
And wonderful spots in between.

Perhaps you’ll find warmth and affection and caring –
A “somebody special” who’s there
To help you stay centered and listen with interest
To stories and feelings you share.

Perhaps you’ll find comfort in knowing your friends
Are supportive of all that you do –
And believe that whatever decisions you make,
They’ll be the right choices for you.

So keep putting one foot in front of the other,
And taking your life day by day.
There’s a brighter tomorrow that’s just down the road,
Don’t look back, you’re not going that way.

Contributed by Siow Wai Wong, Author Unknown.